After Tonight Read online

  Oh, sweet Jesus. This guy.

  My pajamas are on the floor and my panties feel anything but substantial as Smith begins to remove his jeans. They hit the floor with a thud and I almost swallow my tongue when I see the tight black boxer briefs and his healthy erection filling out the front.

  “I’m not going to push you,” he says, coming over me and pressing his hands into the couch cushion on either side of my head. He’s leveraged himself off me and we’re separated by nothing but hot oxygen and pure want. I’m surprised that alone doesn’t make me pull him down against me.

  “But I have to taste you tonight, Hyacinth,” he whispers, his mouth now so close to mine that I can’t tell our breaths apart. “Will that be all right with you?”

  What am I supposed to say to that?

  Well, I know what I’m supposed to say to that.

  I just don’t say it.

  Instead, I say, “Yes.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  Boundaries

  Smith moans in satisfaction as he settles his weight on top of me. When his mouth meets mine, he rocks against me, his cock straining against his boxer briefs and my warm wetness. My eyes close as he switches focus, capturing a nipple in his mouth and tonguing it in a way that is making me crazy.

  “God. Smith.”

  I bite down hard on my bottom lip and his mouth travels, wet and slow, from my breast to my belly. He dips his tongue into my navel, circles it with hot, lush kisses, and then dips even lower. I heave in a deep breath, then stop breathing entirely as he presses his mouth against my core through the thin fabric of my panties.

  “Oh, yes,” I murmur, my hands flying down to grip his hair. It slips through my fingers, but he seems pleased with my enthusiasm. Slowly, he slides my underwear to one side, then settles in between my legs. As he licks his way into my wetness, I feel everything so acutely—his lips and his tongue, the way he devours me, tasting me just as he promised.

  “Tell me,” he whispers, moving to press his lips against my upper thigh. “Tell me you’ve thought about this as much as I have.”

  I swallow hard, closing my eyes.

  “Look at me, Cyn.”

  I can feel my whole body tremble as I gaze down at him. His expression is fierce in the hottest way, as though he’s ready to fight me if I deny what he and I both know is true.

  “Tell me you’ve wanted me as much as I’ve wanted you.”

  I hesitate, then moan as he presses the softest of kisses above my clit. His eyes are still trained on me.

  “Yes,” I breathe. “Yes, I’ve wanted you. I can’t stop wanting you.”

  His smile is brighter than any light source I’ve ever witnessed, and when he dives back into my slick flesh, I’m seeing stars of a completely other kind. He curls his tongue around my clit.

  I think my moans would be embarrassing if I weren’t completely lost to this man. He grips my ass with both hands and squeezes hard. I never though I’d enjoy this kind of possession, but, in this moment, there is nothing in the world I want more than to be owned by Smith Asher. In the past, my sexual experiences ranged from inexpert fumbling to a “ticking the boxes” sort of checklist that I had with Brett. Sex has always felt more like a transaction. But this? This is a whole different thing.

  Smith devours me like I’m sustenance. Like I’m necessary to his survival. I can feel myself growing wetter and more sensitive as he moves his tongue over my most sensitive flesh. When he comes back to my clit, he sucks gently, then grazes it with his teeth.

  That slight edge, that bit of roughness, is all it takes. I shoot off like a bottle rocket, saying things that are less like words and more like prayers, begging him for mercy, then begging him to never stop. I think I’m probably crushing his head between my thighs, but he hums against me and the sound alone throws me up and over another peak of pleasure.

  When I float back to earth, the whole world is upside down. It takes me a second to realize that my body is still on the couch, but my head is now over the side. I feel Smith’s arms around my middle and he hauls me up to sitting. I sort of slump against his chest and, for a long moment, he just holds me. We’re both breathing heavily and I can feel the pounding of his heart pressed against my rib cage.

  He pulls back then and gives me a wry smile.

  “Good?”

  I nod sort of weakly, feeling the blush travel up to my cheeks. Gently, he lays me back against the throw pillows, then crawls over me until our eyes meet as exactly as any mirror image.

  “What do you want to do now?” he asks, his gaze flickering a bit, looking from each of my eyes, back and forth.

  But I don’t say anything—I just press both my hands against his chest and push up until he’s on his knees and I’m sitting in front of him. His body is so incredibly miraculous and, moments later, I’m the one licking and tasting him as I let my tongue explore his taut, tan skin.

  “Have I told you lately that you’re gorgeous?” I ask, biting lightly at his collarbone. I shift slightly and press a hot, wet kiss to his abdomen.

  Smith hisses and I smile up at him, then let my tongue follow the elastic band of his boxer briefs. Unable to stop myself, I reach up and cup his erection from over the fabric. He feels hot and hard and insistent. The groan that comes from him as I slide my hand beneath and onto his smooth hardness is a reward in itself.

  “Shit—Hyacinth. Baby.”

  I ignore him and continue to press kisses along his waist and torso while simultaneously sliding his boxers down and off his legs. When he’s completely naked, I rock back on my heels to look him over and I swear, my heart almost stops at the sight. He’s big—way bigger than Brent—and the muscles of his body really should have their own fan club.

  His eyes are focused on me and filled with desire and I realize that I don’t just want to feel him tonight—I want him to feel me, too. I want him to remember every second we’re together. I want him to know how much I’m dying to be in this moment with him—right here, right now.

  I give what I hope is a seductive little smile, then lean in and run my tongue up along the underside of his cock. He shudders hard, hard enough that he almost loses his balance, so I grab his hips and do it again, this time curling my tongue around the head when I do.

  He palms my scalp and I open my mouth to take him inside. He’s warm on my tongue—his taste is slightly salty and intoxicatingly male. I grip the base with one hand and flatten my tongue, licking him up and down like a dessert to be savored.

  “Oh—fuck, yes.”

  His words are more of a groan as he threads his fingers through my hair, then tightens his grip. I lick and suck him, letting him guide the pace one minute, then taking over the next. I slow down, letting my lips glide down his shaft, then back up to the head, swirling my tongue in a strategic circle around the head of his cock.

  I have never, ever enjoyed giving head this much. I never thought I could.

  Smith tugs my hair again, a little harder this time.

  “Shit, baby—you gotta stop.”

  I moan against his flesh, refusing to give it up—give him up—until he physically hauls me toward his face and attacks my mouth with renewed vigor. With little effort, he has me flat on my back and he lowers himself on top of me, letting his hardness prod between my legs. I grind against with a little whimper and he gives me a wicked smile.

  “I love that fucking sound.”

  He moves then, scooting his body down mine until his mouth is level with my breasts. I want to scream at him to come back, until he begins to circle my nipple with his tongue.

  Then, all I can do is moan.

  “I will never get tired of doing this. Of tasting your skin. Of making your body all wet and ready for me.”

  He sucks my other nipple deep, pressing it up against the roof of his mouth, and I’m almost crying, it feels so good. I arch up, offering myself to him, but he’s decided to move on—to move lower. He places kisses along my ribs, then he slides further, kissing just b
elow my navel.

  “Oh, please.”

  I’m aware that I’m basically begging him to go down on me again and I kind of don’t care, because if he doesn’t do it, right this second, I might actually die.

  “Mmm.” He paces a soft kiss right above my clit. “Yeah. One more taste, and then I’ll fuck you just like how you need it. What do you say to that, Miss Hendricks?”

  Fuck. Why does that sound so hot and so wrong all at the same time?

  But before I can decide on which emotion wins out, his mouth is on me again.

  “Yes. God, yes.”

  He chuckles against my wetness, then moves to lick and suckle my clit as he slips a finger inside me.

  The moan that comes next is almost embarrassing—it’s less like a human sound and more like an animal one.

  “You like that?” he murmurs, curling his tongue around my clit and then pressing it flat and licking the entire length of me. I buck up off the bed, unable to control any of my actions anymore. The moaning and whimpering have turned to a keening wail as he adds a second finger and grips my hip to hold me still.

  “You gonna come again, baby?”

  I nod, attempting not to thrash around as the wave of an orgasm begins to crest and froth over all my senses.

  “Let go, Hyacinth,” he murmurs. “Come for me.”

  Then he crooks his fingers inside me and I explode. Waves of color, of light, of all five senses and maybe even a sixth, wash over me as I grip his hair and cry out his name.

  Nothing has ever felt better.

  Nothing has ever been more necessary.

  As I manage to reground myself in reality, he’s grinning sort of smugly as he rises up from between my thighs.

  “You still with me?”

  I nod, reeling a bit from my climax, but more than ready to feel what I’ve been wanting all night. Well, let’s be honest. A lot longer than all night.

  Smith climbs down off the bed and finds his pants on the floor, reaching in to the pocket and pulling out a condom. He comes back over me, propped up by both arms anchored next to my head, and he’s watching me closely.

  “I’m not going to ask you if you’re sure,” he says quietly, “but I want you to know that all you need to do is say stop and I’ll stop.”

  I shake my head. “No. Go. Go go go.”

  He grins at me, then ducks down to kiss me before ripping open the wrapper and rolling the condom on. He settles himself between my legs again and I feel him, still hot and hard against me.

  For a second, it’s like I’m a virgin again. Sex with my ex had never been this keyed up. I’d never been this desperate for it, this turned on. Now you couldn’t stop me if the room were on fire.

  “Hyacinth.”

  Smith whispers my name and lets his forehead drop against mine as his cock slides along my folds. When he finally begins to breach me, we’re both holding our breath and I’m biting my lip so hard, I could be drawing blood. Frankly, I could really care less.

  “God—you’re so fucking tight. Shit.”

  He groans and pulls back, then surges forward a bit harder, making me arch up and moan. He manages to slide an arm beneath my back and press a hand just above my ass, then slips almost completely out, only to slide into me again all the way to the hilt.

  “Fuck.” I close my eyes and try to catch my breath as he presses kisses along my face and jaw.

  “Are you okay?”

  I look up at him. “I’ll be better when you start moving.”

  He chuckles at that. Then, ever so slowly, he begins to pull back and push forward. I whimper against his mouth as he increases his pace.

  “Good, baby?”

  “Mmm.” I thrash a bit. “Harder. Please.”

  He groans and it seems like my request is his undoing. He retreats until I’m practically aching for him to return, then plunges into me, pinning my hips against the bed. I cry out and grasp at his skin, slick with sweat, as he surges forward again and again.

  “You have no idea how much I’ve wanted this,” he half murmurs, half groans into my ear. “When you were teaching? All I could think about was bending you over your desk and pulling up your skirt. When I served detention? I wanted you up against the wall with your panties at your ankles and your legs wrapped around my waist. I’ve thought about fucking you in every way you can possibly fuck someone and it never came close to this reality. Being inside you is heaven, Cyn. You make me never want to leave.”

  As I listen to him, picturing every scenario he’s presenting, my mind starts to grow hazy and there are tingles spreading over my body with every thrust.

  “Oh, God—I’m close,” I whimper.

  Smith speeds up a fraction, creating an incredibly delicious friction.

  “God, you’re getting tighter by the second,” he murmurs.

  He grazes my earlobe with his tongue before biting down lightly. I dig my nails into his shoulder as my second orgasm crests, then crashes over me, this one even stronger than the first. I don’t remember much, other than the fact that I’m crying out and begging and he’s hammering into me with a kind of ferocity that, up until this moment, I had no idea was so hot. When he finally lets out a stilted roar, releasing everything he has to give deep within me, I feel like he’s performed an exorcism—I just don’t know if it’s on him or on me.

  For a long moment, we stay connected. I run my hands over his back and his shoulders as he toys with my hair. Both of us breathe deeply and I wonder if we could actually fall asleep in this position.

  “Still good?” he asks, pulling back to gaze down at me. I nod, feeling a little shy.

  “Still great, actually.”

  Smith grins broadly, then pushes himself up to standing and saunters out my door to the hall bathroom. I marvel at his naked ass because, hell, it’s a fucking marvel, then I bury my face in my pillow and sigh with contentment.

  “Are you hiding?” he asks when he comes back in and sees me. I lift up and shake my head.

  “Nope. Just sharing my unstoppable smile with this pillow here.”

  He crawls over the bed and pulls down the comforter, then wraps it around us.

  “Does that mean you’re spending the night?” I ask as he tucks one end of the blanket under my shoulders. He quirks a brow at me.

  “Well, yeah. Is that okay?”

  I nod and let my head drop against the pillow, then watch him as he adjusts, getting his body comfortable in my bed next to me. The mere notion of that—of him being here, in my bed—makes me both giddy and terrified. Maybe a little more giddy than terrified.

  I close my eyes and try to slow my breathing. Moments later, I feel Smith’s arm curl around my hip and he pulls me closer to him. When I open my eyes, our faces are only a few inches apart. His eyes are even bluer at night than they are in the daytime.

  “Hey,” he says softly. I smile at him almost shyly and I lift an arm up around his neck.

  “Hey back.”

  He smiles and, a few seconds later, his eyes close sort of slowly, like he’s actually fighting the desire to sleep. For a few long moments, I watch the almost imperceptible twitches of his eyelids. I reach up and lay a hand on his jaw. His skin feels like a miracle.

  He feels like a miracle.

  And, more than that, he feels like he belongs here. Right here, next to me.

  For once, I don’t want to overthink everything. I don’t want to dissect the rights and wrongs of this evening. I just want to rest—every part of me, relaxing next to the body of this man that I’ve tried so hard to stay away from.

  ***

  The dawn feels bright and full of possibility when I open my eyes and see Smith’s head on the pillow next to mine.

  I breathe slowly and softly, staring at the shirtless man tangled in my sheets. Last night was a revelation. It was something I couldn’t have possibly planned better. And, sure, maybe it’s complicated. But this morning, complicated feels inexplicably close to perfect.

  Smith’s eyes flut
ter open and his gaze is warm when it lands on me.

  “Good morning.” His voice is gruff and sexy in the morning—of course his voice is gruff and sexy in the morning.

  “Good morning,” I murmur.

  “What time is it?” he asks, reaching to brush a curl out of my face. I reach over to grab my phone off the nightstand and peer at the screen.

  “Nearly eight.”

  He sort of groans and then rolls out of bed. When he stands, I find myself eagerly anticipating seeing his perfect body clad in nothing but underwear.

  “Shit—I promised a friend I’d help him with a few things this morning.” He rubs his forehead. “I should have set my alarm.”

  Then he leans down and braces his hands on the mattress, his face hardly a foot from mine.

  “Although, looking at you all sexy and rumpled like that, all I want to do is lay you back down and fuck you again, this time in all the ways and in all the positions that I’ve been dreaming of every night since I met you.”

  Um, yes please.

  I push up to my knees and place my hands on his shoulders. I know exactly what I want to happen—what my body is craving.

  “Can I convince you to stay for a little longer?”

  I whisper the words, but Smith hears them loud and clear. He sort of groans, then leans forward to press his forehead to mine.

  “I wish I could, baby. God, I wish I could.”

  He presses his lips against mine. The pressure is soft at first, then builds as he moves to kneel on the bed in front of me. He coaxes my lips apart and I moan as his hands move up to cup my breasts.

  “Shit.” He brushes his thumbs across my nipples and I dig my nails into his shoulders.

  “Stay,” I murmur against his mouth.

  He sort of groans, then forces himself to pull back. He gives me a rueful smile as he backs away from the bed.

  “You’re a bad influence,” he says, wagging a finger at me. I bark out a laugh as he grabs his jeans from the floor and starts to pull them back on. When he walks over toward my door to search for his shirt, I hear a loud buzzing nearby. I glance around until I see his phone lying on the floor.